If you had told me a year ago that I would be a happily collared pet, I probably would have laughed at you. And yet, here I am.
My Clark collared me a few days ago. We picked out the day collar together, and had it custom done by Mockingbird Lane Wire, and the creator did an absolutely stunning job with it. See for yourself! (Sorry for the bad photo-dorm rooms don’t do it justice 🙂 )
Once I saw it for the first time, I nearly cried with joy. It represents so much more to me than just a simple collar. It shows the strength of my relationship with Clark, and it also shows how far I have come out of my comfort zone. I have changed so much for the better in the past year, including becoming a pet, and realizing my own bisexuality. This collar is everything beautiful about those revelations to me, and for me, it shows me just how dedicated Clark is to me. We love each other very much. We have our ups and downs just like any other couple, but this- this beautiful collar is a promise to do right by me as my Dom and my boyfriend. It is also a reminder that I love him, and he loves me. It constantly reminds me that since I love him, and am his pet, I should put his needs before my own. I think it tells him the same thing, when he sees it, that he should put my needs before his. (I have always maintained, after seeing how my amazing parent’s relationship worked, that relationships are at their best when both members are bending over backwards for their partner’s contentment.) It is a tangible reminder, even more so than my beautiful ring or necklace that Clark has given me, that I belong with someone, and I have responsibilities to him. Responsibilities that I strive to fulfill in a loving way, because he deserves the best from me.
This collar proves to me that somebody wants me. I am a strange, unique kind of girl- feminist and advocate for human rights in everyday life, environmentalist, and I’ve got more backbone than I know what to do with. In the bedroom, I’m the exact opposite. I admit, at times, the apparent contradictory nature of my life makes my own head spin (although I know it isn’t really contradictory, it only appears so). It is a lot to ask somebody to accept me fully as I am, as fluctuating as I am. When I first started dating Clark, I thought I was straight, I didn’t consider myself a feminist or an activist of any sort, and knew next to nothing about BDSM. Clark has rolled with the changes admirably, adapting like a pro, and this is a physical thank you gift to the both of us for muddling through.
Clark, I love you, darling. Before you got ahold of me, I was an uncut diamond, but now I sparkle, and that’s because under your unconditional love and support, I have been able to grow until I can no longer recognize myself. I have improved myself, and I have a long way to go, but being in love with you is a constant in my ever changing world.